Wednesday, October 14, 2009

"Don't you never say an unkind word about the Time!"

I’m not a person filled with regret. Maybe you are. But I’m not. I guess it could be because I’ve never been one of those people that have ever sat down and listed his hopes and dreams. Maybe that’s lead me to not feel like I’ve missed anything. No accomplishments left unchecked so to speak.

Some may say that it sad. And if they did, they’d be wrong. In fact, for me, it’s quite the opposite. I guess if I sit down and think long and hard about things that I would have wanted to accomplish... then for the most part, I’ve done it.

Wife? Check. In fact she’s a great one. Family? Got that too. So far I’ve a great daughter, not my biological… but she calls me daddy. Dog? Not the English bulldog I’ve always wanted, but a sort of a mini horse with a unique personality. So check there as well. Career? Not yet on that one. But I’m working on it and I’m still young, so we’ll call it pending. Sure there is also a house, car, and other material things like that… but we’re talking real spiritual life stuff. And I am all good there.

Now that you know that I’ve lived a life of fulfillment, I’m going to do my best and come up with all the stuff that I’ve no chance of ever accomplishing but would be pretty damn cool… single, married, old, young, or otherwise.

First, I wish I could have flown just once. And not fake machine assisted flying. I mean the real Superman kind of flying. How cool would that be?

Second, I feel like I missed out on winning the World Series with a walk off home run in game 7 for the Cardinals. I think I would have been pretty humble. The kind of sports hero you’d want your kids to idolize.

Also, if I could have been a special ops bad ass, that’d have been cool. Not like real life stuff, but more like a force of one kind of Jason Bourne guy. Only without the whole memory loss and troubled background thing going on.

Oh and if I could or did have a robot arms, that’d rock. Maybe something that would allow me to be super strong and shoot lasers and stuff, but still looked normal. Because I’m sure big shiny metal arms would be kind of a turn off to my wife.

My buddy John the Neighbor brought up once that if he could be any black guy, he’d be Billy Dee Williams. And I for the life of me can’t think of any reason to be anyone else. So I wish I was Billy Dee Williams for like a week… or maybe two if I got free Colt .45 out of the deal.

And not to make my wife mad, but if I could have hooked up with just one more woman other than her… it would have been Wonder Woman. Not Lynda Carter, but the REAL one from the comics.

After thinking about it I guess there are a lot of things I wish I had accomplished already in life. I could probably go on and on. So I will wrap this up and give you just one last regret for you to think about.

I wish I could have been a popular radio DJ in the 80’s... maybe someone on one of the urban stations, someone hip enough that he'd be the emcee when all the big acts that passed through town. That way, I could’ve just once said this, “Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado… Morris Day and the mutha’ F@$%ing Time!”

That would have been pretty sweet - J

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