Concert Goers As Compared to Kalen.

Way back in July, my then girlfriend did me the honor of becoming my wife… and in doing so made me as happy as I’ve ever been in my entire life. She also, as my groom’s gift, bought her and I tickets to one of my favorite bands… Kings of Leon.

That made me as doubly happy as I’ve ever been in my life.

The concert was last Wednesday night and for the first time since I started following KOL, they were playing a large venue. My wife had seen them with me once before, but our seats at that time were left stage balcony. Not the best head on viewing of a band one would like, but still a pretty damn good time. This time however, she got tickets to the floor and planned our arriving to the arena in time enough to get up front and center.

Both of us knew that having standing tickets to the floor would put us in the middle of a crowd of younger fans. But even when you know that standing ass to elbow with people will no doubt lead to a few frustrating situations. It doesn’t always mean you’ll be ready for how high a temperature your blood will peak when it begins to boil.

Now as a new parent, I admit that I am not one hundred percent perfect at the job. But I do know a thing or two. And one of things I know is that when we as parents have a night away from the kid(s), you don’t want to spend that time with mirroring behavior of your four year old. Especially if those doing the mirroring are near twenty years in age.

I’m good with the trying situations Kalen can deliver… after all; she’s not yet half a decade in age. So when she jumps around ignoring her surroundings and refuses to listen when asked to stop, I can just lead her to her room for a “time out”. If she becomes a nuisance to the other people in our company, we can escort her out and discipline her. But when some random twenty year old hops around ignoring the fact that she is bumping into my wife or surges forward constantly driving knees and elbows into the other concert goers, its kind of hard to snatch them up by their arm and give them a stern talking to.

No… instead of a lecture, with the big kids you sometime have to hurl some well placed expletives and maybe even illuminate how many different ways you can crumple them like an empty soda can. And even then you’re sometimes better suited throwing rocks at a tank.

Call me an old fogey, or maybe it’s the peace of mind that comes with the happiness of fatherhood and marital bliss… but I no longer crave for the confrontational resolutions of my youth. Instead of expressing my anger at 20’somethings, I would much rather spend my night trying to reason with the Kalenator.

Who knows? Maybe we are getting to old for the concert floor. Maybe the pit isn’t for 30’plus people. Maybe the balding of my scalp is the literal manifestation of my dwindling tolerance for younger crowds.

Or maybe my wife’s Facebook status of the night echoed the evening perfectly, “idiot b***hes” are just one of the hazards of going to concerts.

I guess we’ll find out when next I go concerting – J

PS, the “big kids” also spent a significant portion of the night dry humping like kids at rave all hopped up on ecstasy. I just couldn’t find a parallel to that with any of Kalen’s misbehaving.